Get at me!

My big concern about being in America was that I would be faced with a large dose of culture shock, that the world around me would be changed, and that I wouldn't know my place. However, after being in America for a month, I'm realizing something that I had never expected - this world around me isn't that different. Instead, I'm the one who is different.

I'm different and I'm realizing this since I've returned to the United States. I'm not the same. I'm not the same person. Though I thought that it took me a year and a half to get back to "me", I was never getting back to "me", I was getting back to something else. I was finding a different person, a better person, a new person. That person I was trying to find wasn't someone from my past. It was a new sense of self.

It's crazy, but since being in America, things seem to just "happen" for me, if that makes sense. No, it doesn't make sense. It's strange, but life isn't the same as when I left in 2010. Maybe, it's because I'm just making this life what I want it to be. I'm positive, optimistic, and have some fucking "swagga". I have that "get at me attitude" and it's incredible to feel on top of the world, but I'm realizing that the attitude I now have is a culmination of life experiences, of low points, of high points, and of new found confidence in myself. I never thought that Thailand was changing me or had changed me rather, but it's apparent now. I guess we sometimes have to leave our comfort zones or confront ourselves in order to discover what lies within us.

I don't give a shit about drama; I'm not trying to be rude to people. I don't want to bitch and talk shit. I'm different and this is how I'm trying to live my life. I'm psyched about positivity and optimism; I'm all about the "no one's gonna keep me down" mentality. I'm on the fast track and I don't have time for "nay sayers" and negativity, 'cause a month into America living, this is how I am. This is the new me. I'm comfortable in this skin I'm in and all I can say is "Child, please. Get at me!"

What does it take for us to maintain our "stoked", our "amped living", or our "swagga"?

I'm lucky to feel this and I know that now, but I've gotta ride it out 'cause being on top of the world is fleeting. Take advantage of those times when you ride cloud 9; live it up when you are positive and optimistic. Life is beautiful and incredible, but it's a mindset mixed with opportunity...and I'm realizing that now.