Discombobulated

Holy smokes, May is over and it feels like there were three months of activities crammed into one. May was such a whirlwind and at the end of it all, I feel completely discombobulated. For the record, that is a great word, "discombobulated". I like it. It has joined "coalescing" and "talismanic" in my favorite English words list. However, May will not be making it on to a "favorites" list of any kind. Not that May was bad, but it got a little weird. There was just so much going on! Maybe all of this running is making me crazy! That, and starting at a new school and having to work my butt off with 50 children in a class - knowing very veryyyyy basic English - has been a little stressful. Oh, add all of the rain we have been having to the crazy month mix - yes, Phuket is experiencing sheets of rain. Sheeting rain! That's the only way I can describe this downpour of a month. Today, for instance, I had the good fortune of driving through a wall of rain on two different occasions and it dumped on me. Was rainy season that long ago that I really don't remember all of this rain? Apparently, yes. Well, I've been adjusting. I shall be looking glamorous in a plastic trash bag masquerading as a raincoat this season. Which works, in so far as it makes me look like only a partially drowned rat when I arrive at school each day. Yes, the rain supplies that I have only provide basic protection when a motorbike is your sole mode of transportation. I've started daydreaming about being in cars again! It sounds so strange, but I can't help it - daydreams about being inside something while driving instead of relying on my eyelids as windshield wipers working in panic mode through an onslaught of rainwater that sabotages my contacts and leaves me partially blind (struggling to blink that piece of plastic on my eyeball back into place), while bracing against gusting wind, and romping through pot holes disguised by the flood water! I'm a piece of work this month, I tell ya. So, yes, I'm permanently connected to 7/11's finest rain poncho and avoiding the streets - turned canals, as much as I can help it. That means it's mostly me, my cat, and my jungle this month - staying sane with tasty beats and internet connectivity.

May is about "holing up", as I call it. Some might say Phuket's weather is turning us into hermits, but the alone time has been much appreciated after a month of traveling and having someone else up in your business - all of the time. Disclaimer: My vacation was nothing short of amazing and I'm still hanging out with all of the people I was traveling with, as they are my family after all, but I've been relishing in alone time, watching guilty pleasure television shows, painting, and running. There's only 2 remaining weeks before the big race and I'm actually feeling...ready. Can you believe that? Ready, for a marathon! Despite the month of traveling and vacationing, despite lapses in healthy eating for lapses in junk food and nights out, and despite my negative Nancy attitude/shoulder angel sabotage, I have cut down on my nights out significantly and as a result, I'm running like a maniac. Jason and I conquered about 20 miles on Thursday in about two and half hours...and I felt great! Well, my right knee has been giving me a little bit of trouble towards the end - just aching a bit, but since resting for a few days, I'm rejuvenated and really getting there. Who would have thought - Nicola Rose becoming a runner.

I put the last half of  the word, "runner", in italics, because it was around November last year, when Jason and I were talking about running together, that I attempted to explain to him that there is a big difference between someone who "runs" and a "runner". Someone who runs, I believed to be someone like myself in November of 2011, a person who runs to warm up, likes a bit of cardio, but goes for about 30 minutes (tops!), and calls it a good run. A runner, is someone who really runs. Someone who is fully committed to the activity, runs for the sake of running (masochistic as I might have previously viewed it), and perhaps trains for running events i.e. 5k, 10k, and marathon type races. I attempted to communicate to him as clearly as possible that I was not a runner and that I was just someone who wanted to run to be in shape. He attempted to diminish my concerns and reiterate that he wouldn't judge me for not being a runner, but that he just wanted someone to run with - runner or not. (This whole time though, Jason was laughing at me for continuously putting emphasis on the "ner" part, along with my attempt to beat into him the point that I was not in any sense...a runner. I was desperate in this conversation if you weren't already able to tell. Me, a runner? No, thank you!)

Then, we competed in a 12k Fun Run - just for fun, right? As I told you, my shoulder angel was chanting in my ear the whole time, "You can't do it; you can't finish this." Still not a runner, I did run the race, completed the race, and did pretty well.

And, now? Well, shoot. Here we are. I'm getting ready to run the big race and I guess in these last couple of months, I've become, well, though I hate to admit it, and I swore it wasn't possible, I've become a runner. June 10th is D-day. Stay tuned.





In other news, I'm painting a mural in my house during all of these rainy days Phuket has been experiencing and it is going to be absolutely ridiculous. It is jam packed with color, silly quotations, and it is MASSIVE. I've been painting this thing since March and it is now, finally, almost done. Give me a couple more days and there with photographic evidence of the stark yellow wall's transformation in my house.

Lastly, I am buying my ticket home this week and I'm so freaking excited. I can't wait to make it official. Butterflies aside, this is going to be one hell of a trip! August, hurry up and get here!

Well, after I flushed all of this out, some of the issues that didn't make the blog post, now seem less daunting than before. I guess this is how I deal with my worries or concerns - start writing them and they become a lot more manageable. Life is good and I'm psyched for another month. Okay, I can do it; bring it on!